13 February, 2012
This weekend has been restorative. Nothing special, yet all those little things that make you feel light.
Like cooking good food, eating good food, drinking good wine and enjoying good music. And all with the best of company.
I can't put my finger on exactly when the swtich flipped, but all the little things that were worrying me, that I was stressing about. All the negative energy, restlessness, feelings of discontent and unease. They are no longer. They're just gone. Dissipated.
The things that need taking care of are still there but I feel renewed, strengthened, with resolve, like I got this. The anxiety is gone and I am left with a feeling of calm and happiness.
And I am still trying, still working hard to achieve what I want. But I have this feeling. Of gaining momentum. Of letting go of comparisons. Of something on its way to me. Of being seen.
I look back on the last 2 years. They haven't been easy. But they have been right. Purposeful. I have learnt so much and feel like everything so far has been leading up to now and what is to come. And I have a lot of people to thank. They have helped, they have supported, they have given praise and put me in my place.
But there is one person most of all who, I firmly believe, without them I would not be who I am or where I'm at now if it wasn't for them. They know me, often better than I know myself, and their wisdom and patience and encouragement and support is more than I could ever have hoped for.
And they still give it, continuously and so readily. It amazes me. And I can only hope that myself as an indivudal and life in general can reward them in time. For they so deserve it. More than anyone I've ever known.
They say time flies when you're having fun. And this last 2 years has passed by at warp speed. And yet I feel like I've been able to enjoy each and every bitter and sweet moment.
So thank you.