17 August, 2011

Write on Wednesdays – Piqued

So this is my second instalment for WoW, I hope my first week’s success wasn’t a fluke and you all enjoy this one just as much.

Write On Wednesdays

The word of inspiration this week is piqued. Like most words, this one can have a number of meanings but for the purpose of this exercise, the meaning I am taking from it is this:

Piqued: a state of vexation caused by a perceived slight or indignity, a feeling of wounded pride
1. To cause to feel resentment or indignation

Hmm, is that cheating? Am I supposed to let you figure it out from my writing? Oh well, I’m a rebel what can I say?

The little notification pops and my smartphone hums on the bedside table, vibrating with the same excitement that I am feeling. I sit bolt upright, scrambling for the phone, half of my brain anticipating if this is THE message I’ve been waiting for, the other half glad no one is here to see me fumbling like a desperate fool. I tap the flashing icon, my stomach a rollercoaster ride of hope and expectation. The email application opens and it’s there! THE email. The one I’ve been waiting for.

My heart beat races as I stare at the screen excited at what might wait inside that message, scared that it will not be what I hope for. I take a deep breath and will myself to open the email. Holding my breath I skim down the preamble and my heart skips a beat, my breath whooshes out in a disappointed sigh and my heart sinks.

Thank you for your submission however we do not require your services at this time. 

One. Tiny. Sentence. That is all they feel I deserve? Not even any feedback?  I drop my phone to the bed and fall back into my pillows, too disappointed to read any more. A mixture of thoughts and emotions swirls in my head, a cacophony of negative self-talk and petty, resentful thoughts. I feel piqued, frustrated, disheartened, like a failure. I close my eyes, considering if I could have done better, if I should have done better. I spent hours writing that thing, a damn near masterpiece. Where did I go wrong? What were they looking for? Whatever it was, I didn’t have it.

I sigh, gathering up my thoughts and courage. Do I respond graciously? Do I not respond at all? I feel like sending an angry email demanding justification of their decision. But I won’t. It’s not my right. I put myself out there, opened myself up to their judgement. I guess I just have to take my lumps when their judgement is not what I was hoping. This could have been one of my biggest opportunities, and yeah, I didn’t make it but at least I didn’t miss it. I gave it a go. A very wise man once said to me ‘don’t ask don’t know’. And now I know. I need to work harder, work smarter.

I pick up my phone and tap out a quick response thanking them for their time and return my phone to its spot on the bedside table. If nothing else, this is motivation to keep pursuing all avenues, keep pushing to get myself heard. Sinking back into my pillows I close my eyes, searching for the inspiration to begin again. The little notification pops and my smartphone hums again. Smiling to myself I reach for the phone with a little more calm and restraint, glad I didn’t put all my eggs in the one basket.

Well in case you couldn’t guess, this piece was about my writing getting rejected by a company/publication. I count myself very lucky to say this hasn’t happened yet but I know it is inevitable. I only hope I deal with the situation as well in real life as my character did here.

How do you handle rejection?

17 comments (+add yours?)

Naomi said...

How do I handle rejection? Outwardly in a cool, collected manner. On the inside, like a toddler sometimes!

I think just putting writing out there is a brave thing. Well, it is for me anyway. I like how the character handles the rejection, and I love that all their eggs are not all in one basket!

Tony said...

Just like that! wow Sheri, that is so real I thought you were writing from experience,great writing again.The worse thing about real life is that these days you usually don't even get a message saying you were rejected.
Pressure's on Girl, you are setting a high standard :)

Sheri Bomb said...

I definately know how you feel Naomi! Putting your writing out there is pretty brave, it certainly opens you up to rejection.

Sheri Bomb said...

haha thanks Tony :) I found it easy to write this realistically as this moment has transpired for me a few times, just as I describe it except I've been lucky enough to get the response I was hoping for. The rest was just a little 'creative license' haha

One of the things I like about the way I ended this (and only just noticed this) is that we don't know if the second message is rejection as well - imagine if it was!

This one actually got my juices flowing, sorry if it's a bit long but once I started I just couldn't stop.

Sarah Mac said...

I thought this was a real life experience too Sheri. You captured it perfectly.

I love the way your characer handled it and I'd like to think that if I were in that situation then I wold do as well (although I suspect there would be a lot more weeping and wailing first :)

Hoping you continue with this so that we DO know what the next email said.

Sheri Bomb said...

Haha thanks Sarah :) even I don't know what the second message says yet, I haven't decided...which is kind of exciting, I've not felt like that about my writing before :)

Would like to continue with this but I'm really enjoying the separate little snippets of stories so who knows what next week will bring! Thanks for reading :)

Domesblissity said...

What a great themed blog Sheri. Love the Western theme. I also loved your writing too. I could so relate to the rejection your character felt. Not so much with rejection from publishers but other similar experiences in my life. It's exactly like that. I hate, too, when you're just dying for that call, the phone rings and it's someone like Mum or my husband. Normally I wouldn't feel so disappointed that they had rung. You captured all those emotions really well I felt.

Anne xx

Max said...

This is a great piece of prose, Sheri ... and not everything needs a clear ending.

Have your read the Harry Potter series in full? It is what it is, but why, oh why did she shove that last "wraps it all up" chapter in the last book?

Loved this entry!

Anonymous said...

Great capturing of reality! I felt dissapointed with your character and would love to hear more! :)

Jaimee said...

I love the word "cacophony"! You made me smile. Then I felt your axiety. Here's to all your endeavors being received and celebrated as they should be. Thank you for sharing.

Sheri Bomb said...

Thanks for all your feedback guys, I really appreciate it :)

Max, I've only read the first two books so I don't really know what you're referring to sorry!

Jaimee, I didn't intentionally use that kind of word it just sort of came out...but I do love that word! And I'm glad it works in there and doesn't stick out like 'oh I'm trying to use a big fancy word' haha

No one said...

Gosh! It has happened to me and you captured that feeling so, so well! I kind of actually relived those moments (it was a little crushing!). Really well written!

Sheri Bomb said...

Thanks Sif, sorry to take you back to that feeling, it really does suck!

InkPaperPen said...

I felt like I was on a roller coaster ride, along with your character. Excited, hopeful, disappointed, confused, depressed, reflective, determined, resolute. Clever piece and an entertaining read to boot, it was a fabulous ending.

I love what you are bringing to WoW. Lets hope all the practice gets you closer to that acceptance email...

Gill x

Sheri Bomb said...

Thanks Gill I'm really enjoying it :) and thanks for creating WoW I'm so glad I found it, it not only gives me a great chance to get my creativity flowing but I'm almost surprised by how much pleasure I get from it.

Glad you enjoyed reading :)

Lene said...

I felt so disappointed for your character! You have captured the emotion really well here. An enjoyable read, hope her next email is a brighter one!

Laura Maria said...

Enjoyed reading this. I was anticipating the email every bit as much as your character!

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